this week the plan

but first, a life update:

i don't really have any life event to update here. nothing special! sorry for teasing. i just wanted to have a little think about relaxing. do you relax? what do you do to relax? because personally, i am NEVER relaxed. i can't just come home from work and plop down on the couch and really just chill or veg out without thinking of all the things i could or should be doing. things like cleaning the apartment, working out, doing some sort of productive hobby, worrying about life's problems etc. i can remember feeling relaxed as a kid but i just can't do it anymore. the thing is, i know it's not going to get any easier. i live alone, i have a job, i don't have any kids. it must be so hard for people with families who don't get a spare moment for themselves. does it get easier or harder? does relaxing even exist?

so this week the plan.

exercise and events:

monday: swimming and book club

tuesday: running and dinner at my parent's house in the burbs

wednesday: nothing and date night

thursday: running and regular pre-weekend cleaning. maybe i'll see if one of my girlfriends wants to go to the movies. maybe!

friday: nothing and ???

saturday: running and ???

sunday: maybe nothing, maybe swimming.

it's hard to plan too far in advance, especially when i don't know what is going on next weekend.
in other news, i am going to have one of those green monster smoothies for breakfast tomorrow morning. they are everywhere in the blogosphere lately and i want to see just how rejuvenating they really are. i think my smoothie will be made from: a banana, some frozen berries, a scoop of protein powder, a T of peanut butter, vanilla almond breeze and spinach.

call me a thespian

hi everybody. my acting debut last night was awesome. i remembered all my lines and threw in some funny improvs (i think) and people laughed. great success. people thought i came from an acting background which was the biggest compliment i could have received. i am not a shy person but am VERY quiet. if i don't have anything to say i just won't say it. silences do not make me feel awkward at all - i just sit through them. silence is golden. i even tell my cat "shhhhh, stop meowing, let's be quiet" HA!

fashion update: i got the shoes after all. i went back to the first location and retried on the size i thought was too big and they fit. i don't know why i thought they didn't fit. i am notorious for getting shoes that i think fit perfectly and then they are too small. i just want my feet to look cute and small in trainers - that is the problem. i am quite annoyed at myself for driving all the way to the other mall just to find them when i didn't even have to. anyway, it's in the past. all that matters now is that i have cute shoes. remind me to untie the laces EVERY time i take them off, instead of doing that step-on-the-heel-with-your-other-foot move that causes shoes to ruin.

fitness update: monday was running and tuesday i swam for about 30 minutes. i only did 100 lengths instead of 120 - whoopadeedo. this couple came into the pool and were being all smoochy-boochy and it was making me feel annoyed at them, only because i was hungry. otherwise i don't mind the love. PDAs, bring them on, i don't care. yesterday i did nothing because it was my acting debut. and today ... well, right now i am at the gym in my office running on the treadmill. well, i hopefully am if no one else is on it. there is only one. can you tell i am pre-posting today? i brought my running stuff and my shower stuff. i just want to have my evening tonight to relax. by relax i mean clean the toilet ... GROAN.

food update: not much to say here. i think i need to bring less food to work because it seems if i have it, i will eat it, regardless of whether or not i am even hungry. i can't keep emergency snacks in my desk because i want to eat them all right away. even pb2 can be dangerous. i need to work on eating more filling meals, rather than less filling meals in combination with snacks. today i am tracking points and calories, just for interests sake. by the end of the work day, if i eat everything i brought (which i will) i'll have consumed: 14.5 points and 835 calories. interesting, no?

i have a life update too, but i'll post it tomorrow. now you have to come back!

tuesday

it's tuesday or, as my bf says, almost the weekend. it's a good attitude.

last night i did not go swimming as planned. i went running instead! i didn't go for 5 miles but i did 4.3 or something like that and it was awesome. i went later in the evening and it was brisk. i was a bit worried that i wouldn't be able to get to sleep right away but trust me, that wasn't a problem. i am going to swim today instead. i have less time anyway because of my rehearsal, so it makes sense.

while i was running, i noticed that many MANY people were walking along, probably home from work eating chips or cheetos out of a small bag. WTF! Is this really something that people do? maybe it's just me, but I prefer to eat in a pleasant environment where i can truly enjoy my food. sitting in front of the tv or computer for example, if i'm alone. i don't like standing and eating, or walking and eating, and eating on public transit is just gross for many reasons. eating in your car is ok, but it's kind of mindless. it just kind of struck me dumb. no matter how hungry i was, i would never NEVER buy a bag of chips from the convenient store and munch them down while i was walking home. wow. i'm talking at least ten people. enough for me to notice. a homeless woman also tried to squeegee me, but that's another story.

i saw these awesome sneakers at stylesense and i want them so bad but they aren't in my size. yesterday i trekked all over the GTA in my car to find them with no avail. i called first but store policy is not to do shoe checks over the phone. store policy is the armpits, if you ask me. they are coach shoes and normally i'm not into name brands (i just don't care about them) but they are so cute and comfortable, and not bulky in that teenage-skater-running-shoe way.

thanks to the people who have recently been coming out of the woodwork in my comments. what does that even mean anyway ... coming out of the woodwork? how does something come out of woodwork? and what woodwork? anyway, it's nice to know when people are reading. it makes me want to share more. except it makes me sad when i click on your profile and nothing is there, or your blog is private and i can't read it. i want to know you too. let me in dammit!

this week the plan

my weekend was great but of course it went by way too quickly. i have another busy week this week (what a surprise!) so i have to schedule my workouts and extra curricular activities in advance.

monday: 40 minutes of swimming/extra work to do at home

tuesday: 5-mile run/acting group rehearsal

wednesday: nothing/acting group performance, yikes

thursday: 5-mile run/regularly scheduled thursday apartment cleaning

friday: probably nothing, maybe swimming ... that's a big phat maybe/relaxing with boyfriend

saturday: 5-mile run/helping a friend move/boyfriend's bro's birthday party

i think it's manageable. on saturday my boyfriend rode his bike beside me while i ran and it was so much fun (for me, he complained about going slow). for some reason i was running really slow. i don't know why! maybe to maintain a conversation. i was not going any faster than a ten-minute-mile and usually i am between 8.5 and 9.5 minute miles. we did make some stops. we went from my house to his house, and then to kensington market, and then back to my house. having a garmin is so rad. i took POMs suggestion and put a sweat wrist band under my garmin and it really made it a lot less annoying.

vacation

i'm sorry i can't write a large post today because i'm living it up in paris. see?


this should be a good weekend. tonight is my bf's event at the rivoli - it's an indie music + art series so if you live in toronto you should stop by and check it out. all the proceeds go to camh, the centre for addiction and mental health, so it's for a good cause too.

in other news, i am within a pound (which means nothing, remember) of my zone weight. phewf. i will have to watch it next week though. i need to get off the damn see-saw. i promised by boyfriend we could go out for chinese after the party tonight. i love it but it's so bad for you. i've been putting it off for months. i could get healthier options but really, what's the point? i want chicken balls and chow mein, not steamed broccoli. i could make broccoli at home!

have a good weekend :)

i stink

wow. i stink for real. i am sitting here typing and can hardly stand the smell of myself. i just went running and my hair is really wet. i bought new running clothes. they are ugly but they wick away the sweat and supposedly keep me cool. today was hot and i felt okay so maybe just maybe they work.

so yoga jeans - come on people, i posted about them here. i am definitely getting another pair. now they have them in high rise too, sweeeeet. need not want, need not want. they are so comfortable it is ridiculous. and they are nice and dark. and you can put them in the dryer and they will always fit you because they stretch and mold to your body without feeling tight or like they are digging into your muffin top. i hate that feeling.

i have been really good this week. for some reason my body responds really well to laying off starchy carbs. did you know that fitness competitors go off carbs completely to reduce their body fat before a competition? trust me, it's true. i am already about five pounds lighter than i was on tuesday morning. i know, it's wacky. and i'm aware it's water weight but the bloat is gone. i am still above my comfort zone but by tomorrow morning i might be less than a pound away and as we all know, less than a pound really means zero.

my mom said i shouldn't worry so much about what i weigh ... that is a far cry from what she used to tell me when i was chubbier in high school and university. you know, the "do you think you should be eating that?" looks. i thought you ate six hours ago! what are you doing back in the kitchen!!!? just kidding ... or am i?

i think i have to be focused on the scale because if i don't check in, i eat too much (what i think is normalish) and it gets out of control and then i feel bad about myself because 1/2 my pants don't fit (thank you yoga jeans for always fitting). i am just not one of those girls who can put the scale away. the scale is my buddy. actually we are more like frenemies haha but i'm not ready to say goodbye yet.

is the scale your friend? and i'm not talking about numbers here. do you need it? without checking in, will you unknowingly gain and face a horrible shock when you finally do step on? duh duh duhhhhhhhhh!

i hope this post isn't too crazy. i am all out of it from a)running and b) my horrid smell. pee-you.

yikes

i did the weigh-in and it's not good. more than i expected. yikes. it was a bad time to do it (that time of month, after a long weekend where i ate many salty things and drank many types of booze, including wine, wine spritzers, beer, that fruity creme liquor from south africa. amarula or something ... boy is it ever tasty. also mixed drinks, maybe a shot. i was at a wedding, so that explains some of it.

anyway not good. bad news. yikes. the surprising thing it that i was feeling pretty - oh chicago just scored - thin so i thought it would be a good time to do it. wow. obviously my perception of myself is a little off. and i was not even trying on some of my pants. i was wearing skirts and my yoga jeans.

i'm motivated though. i'm not going to count points but i'm going to measure portions and go lighter on the carbohydrates. for some reason protein keeps me really satisfied. not full, but not hungry. not hungry = i'll take it! i'm also going to drink lots of water and try not to overdo the sodium. that's really hard for me because i love love love salt.

today after work i went for a run. a FIVE MILE run! wooooooooohooooooo! that's my longest run since my bum injury last july. i am SO HAPPY that i can run again. SO HAPPY. not being able to do something physical that you actually enjoy because of an injury is devastating. because after you've spent twenty years or however long being a lazy bum all you want to do is move.

back it up

let me set the record straight here: the cleanse i'm doing IS PERFECTLY SAFE. you go about your exercise and healthy eating as usual, but take 2 cleansing pills each morning and 2 each evening for 15 days. this is the exact one i'm doing. it's all herbal and there are no laxative-like properties. it's so gentle that i don't really notice much of a difference because i consume a fair amount of fibre and things like flax seed which are known to flush out the system anyway. so really - it's more for fun than anything else. i do feel less bloated ... sort of. it's hard to tell.

i haven't weighed myself in a while so i don't have anything to report on that front. perhaps i will weigh myself on friday. i don't want to know but it won't be that bad i'm sure. i know i probably am above my happy maintenance zone but it's definitely not by more than 1 to 5 pounds.

the good news is that i have been running again and consistently. i go three or four times per week (not on consecutive days) and have run 3 or 4 miles each time. sometimes i have to stop and walk and sometimes not. i'll regain that endurance if i keep it up. last week i ran monday, wednesday, friday and yesterday (sunday). i went swimming on tuesday and today (monday). i think if i keep up with the running and throw in some cross training activities AND watch my diet on weekdays i'll be able to get down to wear i feel the best.

tomorrow at work we are having a potluck for an upcoming cookbook we are putting out. if you remember last month i spent some days at a food photo shoot. so now we are all testing recipes and recording things like prep time, taste, ease, etc... just to make sure. i made these oatmeal banana bars with walnuts and crazy flours like brown rice flour, barley flour, spelt flour and kamut flour. it's very tasty and my mission tonight is to AVOID EATING ANY MORE so i have some to offer tomorrow.


my other mission for this week is to think about my hunger after exercising. i am in the mindset where i eat after every workout, regardless of whether or not i'm hungry. i think this affected me less in the past because i always worked out before a meal, but now that i work crazier hours it's harder to do that. maybe i should just try to work out before a meal ... thoughts?

do you eat something after every workout? you are supposed to eat protein after a weight training workout, but what about cardio?

i have a confession

today at lunchtime i ran 4 miles. and then i had a shower at work. it was divine. yes, my work has a shower. two actually. let's not dwell on it. the reason i haven't been commenting on any of your blogs this week is because ... i have not read them yet. i'm going to! i swear. i just couldn't watch the biggest loser finale on tuesday night and taped it and didn't want anyone to spoil it with their big yappity yaps. and so i avoided blog reading. surprisingly it was easy because a) i had NO time this week and b) there really wasn't any mention of the biggest loser in regular media sources - news, newspaper, the office water cooler, etc.

if i read on someone's blog who won it would be my own fault for reading it. people can post what they want and should be able to write about relevant tv shows in a timely fashion. anyway i watched last night and spent about 99% of the time fast-forwarding. i do not need to see recaps, thank you. who has the time for that? boring! and then i realized i didn't care about the winner. i didn't really care who won at all. i was happy that mike got so thin - he is only 18 and now can start over at a point in life when most people just start. i feel sorry for his brother though, because you know he's comparing himself to mike every second of the day. mike is the superhuman son who lost over 200 pounds and he is still overweight.

i went running on monday, wednesday and today. i am attending a wedding tomorrow so i switched around my running days. i feel really good about it. i went swimming on tuesday but did not enjoy it. i think i didn't wait long enough before swimming and felt like my stomach was in my neck the whole time.

one more thing ... what did i want to say ... oh right. i am doing a "cleanse." don't get all wacky, it's not like a fast or weird drink. it's just 2 pills in the morning and 2 at night. www.renewlife.ca. i am doing the 15-day first cleanse to prepare myself for the 30-day one, which i will do eventually, but i'm not sure when. random people in my real life kept recommending this cleanse to me - different groups of friends, too. one of my friend's friend's aunt is a holistic nutritionist and swears by these products. they are all natural so it can't hurt. so far (i am on day 2) i have not noticed any difference in ... anything ... but i do consume a lot of fibre anyway. probably more fibre than your average person. fibre is my friend. so fibrous and fibrey. have a good long weekend. i know i will. HA. i'm going to celebrate with a beer.

monday list

1) it's lunchtime munch time. i just ate a full-fat fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt that expired on May 5. IT WAS STILL GOOD. i brought two yogurts just in case. i hardly ever eat full-fat yogurt. actually the tub says 2.5% milk fat which is hardly full fat. still, it was very creamy and delicious. fruit-on-the-bottom is bad for you because it's loaded with sugar but what do i care? i don't.

2) i've thought about it and decided that raspberries are my favourite fruit. they are just so damn good. i like them fresh, frozen, thawed, hot, cold, sour, sweet - gimme gimme gimme. i even like them at the bottom of my full-fat fruit-on-the-bottom yogurt.

3) on saturday i took my new garmin out for a spin and it was the GREATEST THING EVER! except it's very large on my wrist - my only complaint. i had already set up the hrm part but didn't load the satellites until saturday. load the satellites? i never thought i'd be typing those words... what a geek. anyway - i had a great run. some of it was rainy but i was so into tracking my speed and pace and distance that it didn't matter. my bf leant me this super old megadeth hat so the drops wouldn't hit my face. i bet i looked really hardcore - running in the rain (hardcore) AND wearing a megadeth hat (extra hardcore).
4) i am going to run tonight after work by the lake unless i am exhausted. i got 5.5 hours of sleep last night and waking up this morning was BRUTAL.

5) i have to get to sleep early tonight because tomorrow night i am going to a bachelorette party. i don't think it will go too late and i don't think there will be much drinking involved HOWEVER i need stamina.

6) eating was NOT good this weekend. candy, a burger, fries TWICE, late night pizza ... ugh.

7) long weekend coming up - HOORAY!

8) thank you all for the nice comments on my hair. i am really digging it :)

ding dang dong

one more thing - for anyone who watches america's next top model. did anyone notice that celia was eating peanut butter right out of the jar? holy moly. even my boyfriend said WTF - that's so fatty haha.

le sigh

i am now a brunette again. hooray! i feel like a completely new person even though i've only been blond since last september. my bf doesn't know i changed it up. he will be so surprised (evil laugh). and so will my co-workers who have only known me as a blond. the haircut is very catherine zeta jones in chicago.

WHAT IS UP WITH THE ANONYMOUS COMMENT IN MY LAST POST???

seriously? i shouldn't be wearing short shorts at age 27? number one, that's the dumbest thing i've ever heard. number two, jealousy is a very unattractive quality. zing! number three, anonymous comments are so lame. insults without real people to back them up are meaningless and number four, even stacey and clinton say you can wear miniskirts until age 35, and the only difference between a miniskirt and a pair of short shorts is a little flap of material. AND number five, i never felt comfortable wearing short shorts until i was about 25 years old so you better believe i'm going to work it as long as i can. so there. i think i've made my point.

to the rest of you with nice questions and comments, here are my answers:

1) no, i didn't have to keep moistening the strap. it just worked all day (and night!) i did wear an old sort of loosey sports bra to bed, just to make sure it didn't slip out of place.

2) my daily burn is less than the average woman's (i think) for a few reasons. number one, i just don't think my metabolism is that fast. ever since puberty i've had a problem with weight gain. (this runs in my family as well.) if i even look at or smell a chocolate chip muffin i seem to be heavier. not joking. also, it seems like some of my friends can eat a lot more than me and put on weight slower. these are really good friends that i know well (and know their eating habits well), not those people who eat a lot in public and then are very diligent about watching their food in private. also, number two, i am quite light (now that i've lost weight) so obviously in my natural day-to-day movements i don't need as much energy to move around and that means less calories and less food.

3) trying out a hrm for a whole day is AWESOME! i have come to peace with the numbers - they really aren't THAT bad, especially when i compare the calories of my daily points to what i'm apparently burning.

4) i also prefer writing my points down in a book. my book is so little and cute too - fits in my purse and sits on my desk at work without looking conspicuous.

5) everyone's metabolism rate is different based on genetics (inherited metabolism), age, sex, weight, height, activity level... blah blah blah. that's why in weight watchers, the heavier you are, the more points you get. and then when you are me and want to drop a few pounds that you gained, you are stuck with 18 points a day which is inhuman and impossible if you are working out or doing any activity other than sitting all day.

6) i wonder if i have a thyroid problem. since right now i am able to control my weight (somewhat) i won't get it checked, but that's something to think about in the future.

now i have a VERY interesting question. maybe someone knows the answer. apparently, the average resting heart rate for a woman is about 70 beats per minute. mine is 58 - that's very slow. now apparently, the more athletic you are (the more you've worked out especially with cardio), the slower your heart rate is. now, slow is good because it means your heart does not have to work as hard to keep your blood pumping HOWEVER a fast heart rate burns more calories. so as someone with an athletic heart rate, does that mean i am burning fewer calories because my heart beats slower than your average bear? riddle me that! AND i know that having more muscle speeds up your metabolism because a pound of muscle burns 50 times more calories than a pound of fat, but does having more muscle affect your heart rate at all? how would my heart rate monitor detect muscle mass? i don't think it can, but it definitely is raising some questions that make my brain hurt!

now i have to vacuum my apartment. JOY!

HRM stats

bonjour. i have some info for "y'all." yesterday i wore my heart rate monitor from 7am until 6:30am - that's 23.5 hours, almost a whole day. i couldn't leave it on for 24 because i had to shower before work. you know how it is. anyway. i recorded my calorie burn almost every hour on the hour. here are the gory details:

total calorie burn: 1930

average calorie burn while awake: 72 per hour

average calorie burn while asleep: 58 per hour

calories burned during my 3-mile/32:24 minute (in the heart rate zone) run: 300

**** more stats ****

at the end of my awake day (7am to 11pm) including running, i burned 1494 calories.

on lazy days where i do nothing, sleep for 7 hours and am awake for 17 hours, i burn 1630 calories.

on days that i run 3-miles, i burn 1930 calories.

if i run three times per week, i have to eat an average of 1762 calories per day to maintain my weight.

now, of course i really should wear it for more days to have a more accurate average. and i will, but i needed a break from that chest strap. throughout the day, i didn't do too much. i sat on my bum at work and after dinner went out for dinner and then to the movies, which involved more sitting, which is somewhat atypical for most of my evenings (usually i am cleaning or doing something around my apartment).

**** to conclude ****

i was a bit maddened to find out that i only burned 1500 calories on a day that i burned 300 calories running, but i didn't think to add in the calories burned in sleep. i always knew that i didn't burn 2000-2500 calories a day, like the average woman (apparently, according to tv). i feel like my eyes are more opened. obviously i can't change the way my body works but now i can eat with the knowledge of when to ABSOLUTELY STOP. i could work out more or every day but that's unrealistic as well.



i am feeling pretty motivated. i am counting points in a little notebook (online subscription cancelled - do not need it), running three times a week and now i am more aware about what's going on in my own body. i am really inspired by my boyfriend's brother's girlfriend, who recently lost about 40 or 50 pounds by counting ww points herself, without the help of meetings or online resources. she said she was up about six pounds so is tracking again to get back down and avoiding alcohol. it's very inspiring - i can do that too. i really don't need to be drinking any of my calories on the weekend while i'm trying to reach my summer weight. if i just stay strict for a couple of weeks, i'll be there and then i can enjoy the summer and fit into my short shorts again. one of my friend's mottos is: tomorrow is a new day. that used to be my motto too until i got too comfortable with things. when the calories (or points or whatever) are eaten, it's time to stop even if you are still a bit hungry. a little bit of hunger isn't the end of the world and tomorrow is a new day to start again - preferably with delicious oatmeal.

BAD BLOGGER

i am a bad blogger. take me to the garage and shoot me! my mom used to say that - i don't know why. i always thought it was really funny until just now when i thought of it literally and literally it's not funny at all. wow, emo! it's still funny if not taken literally. i can still take a joke ... i hope.

things have been really busy. last thursday i was out of the house from 7:15am (when i leave for work) until 11pm. i went to work, went running at lunch, went to the library after work, to a group meeting, then to see the dears with my boyfriend. long but pleasant day. on friday i came home after work and napped, woke up to eat and watch a bit of tv, then back to sleep at 11. i am battling this throat illness now. what is up with me contracting all of these sicknesses lately? thankfully it's not swine flu. oink oink! i can deal with the throat - it's sinus problems that are killer. head stuffed up = can't think = can't work but still have to work! look - here we are on thursday at the concert in the pouring rain - the radio station was taking pictures of people with neat umbrellas. mine is a monet - my mom gave it to me for easter ... thanks mom!

yesterday we went to see franz ferninand and i didn't get home until midnight. i had a nap before the show but still. it's concert city lately =D spring is here and so is the music.

i went for a run today at lunchtime. work is over but i'm still hanging around. i'm meeting my mom and sister at swiss chalet for dinner and then meeting some girlfriends at the movies here in the burbs. we are going to see ghosts of girlfriends past.

running is going well. today i am monitoring my calorie burn a la shirls. i am tracking it on my HRM from 7am this morning until about 11pm tonight - that's probably when i'll go to sleep. i will share the results tomorrow but can tell you right now that it pains me how low it is.

i forgot to share the big news with you all. are you ready? really? ok here it is. 1/2 scoop of protein powder in the oatmeal is tastier than one full scoop, but not as tasty as ZERO scoops, hehe. i do like protein powder mixed with fat free plain or vanilla yogurt though - yum. i had some today for lunch with raspberries mixed in.

i better get going! i am going to canadian tire to buy myself this zero-gravity chair for summer reading on my balcony. i was also going to buy this breadmaker because it's 45% off but changed my mind. i will never bake my own bread. i've used my rice cooker ONCE and my crock pot ZERO times. these are things i'm sure i'll use when i have a family, but i don't need more stuff collecting dust in my tiny condo. the end. thank you and goodnight.