not meeting goals

ack, one week down and already i am not meeting my goals.

1) i am trying to ease up on myself but it's difficult. last night i was suffering through a bought of poor self-esteem. i wanted to go to the gym but was just too tired from all of the weekend festivities, and then time ticked on and on and it was too late. i am going to get my hair "did" this week and then i'll feel better. i noticed that my roots are out of control and that is probably 75% of my issue!

2) since i didn't work out yesterday as planned, i only completed three out of four 40 minute cardio sessions. i did do two yoga/pilates videos, so all is not lost. i was thinking if i did five cardio sessions this week i could call myself even and move forward. sometimes four is a lot, especially during the the first week back from holiday!

that's that. i already feel better. writing things down really does help. and, even though it's january (the most depressing month), i have a lot to look forward to.

a) the prospect of a new job. nothing is happening yet, but positive thinking will work for me. and of course i keep applying for more jobs!

b) getting my hair done. so worth the money!

c) gossip girl tonight. and last night i finally watched that "being erica" show (new on the cbc) and it's pretty cute!

d) my boyfriend booked us a valentine's weekend getaway to niagara falls. &hearts &hearts &hearts, complete with king bed and jacuzzi tub. swoon! this will be our third valentine's weekend in niagara falls.

e) tonight i am going to get physical. swimming, or a video, or maybe just treadmill walking. something and it's gonna be amazing!

f) the tuna/hummus wrap i have for lunch. 1/2 can tuna (1.5 points), 30g sabra classic hummus (2 points - and if you haven't tried this brand you are missing out, it's seriously AMAZING), on a flat out wrap (1 point), with a side of steamed edamame (2.5 points).

in other news:

1) i have decided to avoid running until the weather is warm. not because i hate the cold (i do), or am lazy (i am not... hmmmm), but because i am still experiencing some bum pain from time to time and i think the only way to make it disappear forever is to refrain from doing any activity that aggravates it until it has been gone for a long time. right now sometimes i can run and sometimes i can't, but it's not enjoyable because i'm out of running shape and each run is such an enormous effort. not worth it. i will revisit this topic later!

2) on the weekend a group of my friends and i went to check out (oh, by the way, this is not for the faint of heart or the easily tempted!) a new quebec-style poutine shop that opened recently. smoke's poutinerie uses real cheese curds from quebec and there is a large variety of types and toppings. i got the mama's poutine, which is traditional poutine with slow roasted chicken chunks and green peas. delicious although afterwards my stomach was sending me a few signals suggesting this poutine should be a rare occurrence. the boys got crazy poutines with italian sausages, bacon, sweet onions... too much! a picture of smoke's poutine can be found here.

wednesday

why do things that are bad for you taste so good with coffee? for example: croissants, muffins, chocolate, anything with butter, pastries, etc. i am enjoying a chocolate right now, with coffee. (reheated in the office kitchen coffee but that's besides the point.) did i mention this chocolate is from italy? yes, it's true. it's sort of good but in that "icey square" chocolate kind of way, and i usually prefer harder chocolate. hopefully one square will be enough to satisfy my craving and move on.

this morning i swam for 30 minutes. when i got home from work last night i did 30 minutes on the bike downstairs and really pushed it at the end and now my legs hurt. swimming is a nice break from legs for me because most of my movement in swimming comes from my upper body. i wanted to ride my bike again to work today but it was raining. nooooooooooo! it's supposed to clear up so maybe, if i'm lucky, i can walk home.

it's funny how priorities change, isn't it? now i'm "lucky" if i can walk home, where as my mindset used to think that was one unlucky break. like if i was walking home from somewhere, and someone i knew came by in a car, and drove me the rest of the way, i'd be thrilled. now i would say, "no thanks - keep it movin' buddy!" and keep walking.

so tonight is date night, which means dinner at my bachelorette pad and watching of ANTM, good enough for me. but if my boyfriend suggests making poutine for dinner one more time, i'm gonna lose it. seriously, that is all he EVER wants to eat. and if i give in and we eat it on wednesday, he still wants it on the weekend. don't get me wrong, i love poutine. we even make a healthy (somewhat...) version, so it's not that terrible. but variety is the spice of life people, let's try something new. for those who don't know, poutine is a wonderful dish from Quebec. traditionally it's fries, topped with cheese curds and covered in gravy. mmmm. we use mccain oven fries (the lowfat variety), with part skim shredded mozzarella cheese, and a packet of powdered swiss chalet gravy (which is only about 20 calories for 1/2 cup or something). so really not bad. now that i'm going on and on about it i kind of want it too. if he wants to make dinner then i will indulge his love of poutine tonight ;)

enough blabbing. i am going shopping at lunch because on friday night i am going to a wedding shower and i have nothing to wear. nothing "classy" anyway. nothing that fits! why did i watch biggest loser last night instead of going through my closet?! if i can get a nice high-waisted pencil skirt or something then i'm set. wish me luck.

today i'm eating:

1/2 granola bar

1/2 banana
a few handfuls of honey nut all bran
steel cut oats with some added all bran

chocolate square (from italy!)

grapes and yogurt

oatmeal with added bran (maybe)

red, orange, yellow peppers with spicy hummus dip

dinner - probably poutine

fit but not going to strip

good afternoon to you. here are the latest scoops in a list format:

1) my sewing class was great. i learned how to use different kinds of sewing machines, how to thread a machine, how to wind a bobbin, how to pin things, cut fabric, use a fancy iron, and make a pillow. my pillow looks great and not to boast but i think it was the best in the class. why? well, there were only six of us and also, i took my time. i didn't rush through the stitches. less pressure on the foot people - slow and steady wins the pillow race in the end. so i forgot to take a photo of it this morning, but i will.

2) i walked home, got home and my foot was freezing. i made oatmeal and tea and it was delicious. then i vacuumed my entire apartment. i love having a vacuumed apartment because it's all some sort of fake wood and i hate anything crunching beneath my feet.

3) this morning, as you can see by the new exercise panel on the right hand side of the page, i wanted to get up early and do a long incline switching walk on the treadmill. to do that i have to get up at 6:15 am. but i didn't get up until 7 am. so... i did the only workout video i have. carmen electra fit to strip! before you get too excited i only have the second workout dvd in this series, and it doesn't include any stripping. this is the fitness dvd, that is designed to give you the body you want to strip with. it's actually a good video and a good workout and right now my bum hurts.


4) i have a date tonight and once again, by date i just mean my boyfriend is coming over and we are going to make dinner and do some smooching. i love these dates. except he always wants to eat poutine. he would eat poutine every night if he could. granted, i am not worried about calories or points as we make a very low fat version (low fat mccain fries [the pink package], reduced fat mozzarella, and swiss chalet home style powdered gravy) but still. how much poutine can one person eat? i think i need to work on my chef skillz. skillz with a z.

5) today i'm eating:

before fit stripping:
1/2 banana
tea

got to work:
coffee
1/2 banana

and then:
2 melba toast rounds

and then a breakfast snack:
weight control maple brown sugar oatmeal (seriously this is addicting)
fat free source yogurt

and later i will consume...

for lunch:
lean cuisine mango chicken curry

and a snack:
a fat free vanilla source yogurt

and for dinner:
anything but poutine